Redefinition

Introduction

Let's start by redefining some terms that I will use for easier visualization with different intended meanings.

Person: That's what I call some values that determine the psychological state. For instance, Mark is a person means Mark is a collection of data that represents a summation of traits. The plural of person is persons.

Illusion: While schizophrenic people often don't realize their illness, and thus be called "illusion", illusion here is a word for the overlap between one or multiple "persons". It will be easier to understand what I'm spewing if it was thought of as an illusion.

Depression: This is a word for the severe illusion characterized by toxic overlap between a person and another.

The Clown, Pogo Those are our persons.

The Clown

Our first person is the Clown. He wants to make everyone pleasant by making a fool out of himself. But he is okay with it. He doesn't mind deprecating his well-being most of the time as long as people around him will enjoy his presence. He loves everyone. He acts most of the time virtuously. He is a bit insecure about his social life. He always wants to widen his gang and create a rich brotherhood. He is humorous and hysterical. You can sense his caring about people as he wants to entertain his social circle frequently. He is a kind person with simple needs who earns his dopamine from others' laughter.

People are his source of pleasure.

Pogo

The main characteristic of this person is lacking a pleasure source. He is never satisfied. Still, he constantly seeks dopamine shots. He is a greed person who always thrives more. People to him are tools to gain power. He cares about no one but himself. He loves himself and thinks that the world revolves around his dick. He is a lawful-evil kind of guy. You can sense the harmony in all of his actions. Pogo is exquisite.

Behind this magnificent narcissistic person, an intense collision occurs due to his continuous craving that never yields pleasure. With a distance that exceeds 5 meters, Pogo's charm intensity increases exponentially. That's the reason that if you texted him, you'd get totally swarmed into his charisma. As you go closer, you will notice that this charm is just the illusion he created in order to fulfill one of his desires.

The Overlap

The Playground

While Pogo and The Clown are two tragically distinct persons, they can create a masterpiece. With a healthy amount of Pogo's infinite desires, social superiority, and intellect mixed with Clown's caring about people and trying to make everyone around him "happy" or comfort them in a way or another, an illusion of the perfect person who can be considered a phenomenal friend, hot-achieving boyfriend, and a charismatic leader.

However, that's not always the case

A Fatal Tragedy

D I

The only person capable of being "pleased" is The Clown. Still, he is shadowed in the dominance of Pogo. Pogo usually has no reason to be happy. Also, he has no reason to be sad. Nonetheless, he is always thirsty for "achieving". It can be in terms of power, competitions, or even winning debates against random people, The Clown, or himself. The issue is that The Clown needs to be happy to survive. Pogo's nature does not act the way that rewards The Clown pleasure. His hunger for dominance is carelessly augmented with pride, greed, envy, and sloth, making him the literal incarnation of sin. His way of dealing with people is treating them as cases to study and explore new aspects of life.

When The Clown likes a person, he will try to make them laugh and continuously support them. On the other hand, Pogo will tell them the shit they wanna hear to have them in his palm. This occurs with friends, family, and almost any social interaction with the "illusion".

The repelling creature formed due to this collision derives a depression for The Clown. Pogo is in the back untouched, but The Clown, the only one who can feel, suffers. Pogo needs a functioning body to use and dominate, so he asserts the survival of The Clown by giving him happiness in the form of dopamine shots from nicotine or masturbation. He throws a new fetish here and there to hang The Clown in.

The Clown is a little submissive boy who has no word about his future. Unfortunately, he is the tool Pogo needs to keep up procurement.

D II

The Clown and Pogo are distinct, but they are blending in a way they are indistinguishable. People deal with the illusion thinking it is Pogo or The Clown. The thing the transition is not as smooth as you think. For instance, a joke or a good act can be said by The Clown to make you laugh with generous altruism. But they can also be done to manipulate you beneficially for Pogo. He may recognize your value and wants to invest in your relationship. Or he knows that you will help his little Clown to be marginally happy. The only variation is that Pogo will do a sufficient amount to achieve his purpose. When The Clown wants more, Pogo will smack his well-being into a hole of depression and spray repelling scent all over his body so he smashes any links to people.

Pogo has a single goal; attain. He forces The Clown not to consume power in anything that would alter his desire.

Pogo has physical dominance over The Clown. While it is Clown's body, Pogo controls the mind, the active part of The Clown's corpse.

D III

Pogo is an intelligent person. When he presented the first two dilemmas, Pogo authentically portrayed our collision. But I need to tell you, he is an apathetic piece of shit. He can chronicle my misery, but he will never go through its sensations. And here I am, a perished Clown who always gets disregarded. Pogo's ignorance regarding how feelings work erases the essential component of a contented and blissful life; self-consciousness. He pushes the body to exceed its limits for achieving nonsense like licking the fence of some random house. Pogo may not have mentioned it, but his "achievements" are not actual accomplishments. His desires are more random than /dev/urandom. I remember one time it was 4 AM, and he forced me to walk for about 6 kilometers to get a Cinnabon. Both of us knew that it would be impossible to find that shit at this time. However, he obliged me to strain myself. When I do something thoughtful and kind, he either cries in laughter or shows me the dark side of what I did and tries to exploit it.

The headache here is formed when "Did I do this good deed for myself or have Pogo made me do it?"

I have never met Pogo... I think we need to work on our communication and fix this shit. Pogo is destroying every inch of The Clown and changed his goal from "being happy" to "barely existing".

Bla, Bla, and Bla.

The Clown is an under-achieving bitch who does not resemble the illusion. Without Pogo, the guy you will be dealing with will be a submissive sissy who sucks dicks for living as it "makes people happy".

He ain't know shit and needs to find a real purpose. The feelings which The Clown claims exist are invisible illusions people use to rationale their weaknesses.

The only feeling The Clown can have is gratefulness for Pogo's existence.

Bro, be grateful.